Tag: present moment mindfulness

Finding Stillness at Charlton Lake Camp: A Reflection

by stephsimply, posted in Travels

“Only in quiet waters things mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.”–Hans Marggolius

The view through the screened in porch overlooking Whitefish River a throughway to Charlton Lake, Frood Lake, and Cranberry Lake.

Still Waters 🏞️

I sat observing the waters of the Whitefish River flowing toward stillness–moving from one lake to the next, but in a relaxed state of flow that most often seemed to occur in the early morning or late evening.  Occasionally, something would break the surface, and rings would begin spreading outward from the epicenter. When this would happen, I often caught myself holding my breath in anticipation until the last ring dissipated, and the water was once more placid.  Then, with the stillness restored, I resumed my own cadence of breathing slow and steady, matching the river’s pulse.

The peaceful, craggy rise of quartzite rise of the ancient La Cloche Mountains surrounding the lakes.

Lake Charlton Camp 🏕️

My husband, John, and I were staying in Charlton Lake Camp (CLC) located in Killarney Provincial Park, Willisville, Ontario. This was our second trip to CLC, situated in a natural showcase of diverse pines, surrounded by the white quartzite crests of the La Cloche Mountains and translucent, tea-stained waters of Charlton Lake, Frood Lake, and Cranberry Lake with the Whitefish River providing a throughway to the lakes. In the morning, CLC was filled with a wilderness chorus of birdsong, loon calls, bull frogs, lapping sounds of water against rocky shores, and, of course, the buzzing hum of countless varieties of insects. 

The cabin in which we stayed at Lake Charlton Camp is just beyond the steps that lead to the dock.

Settling into Quiet 🤫

Breathing in deeply, my lungs filled with the aromatic aromas of pines, damp soil, sunned rock, and a hint of morning coffee as I continued to sit and observe, communing with my surroundings. The sun would soon begin lifting above the craggy cliffs behind the cabin in which we stayed, and life would soon begin stirring with those gleaming rays. But, in that moment, hovering between the hush of night and the dawn of daybreak, there was a stillness in which my heart was soft and open–receptive to that still small voice that resides within.

Boating through Frood Lake with the La Cloche Mountains in the foreground.

Slipping into the Gap of peacefulness 😌

I once read that praying is talking to the Divine Creator; whereas, meditation is stilling the mind for the purpose of listening.  Sitting there on that screened porch on the cusp of a new day, I was reminded of that idea.  My heart, head, and soul had relaxed enough to hear the truth–to really parse the ongoing narratives that, when left unchecked, my brain tends to repeat on an endless loop. By settling into the surrounding peacefulness, I could focus on listening, and begin to see how many of those narratives were (and are) often baseless claims forged by past experiences, trauma, anxiety, negative self-talk/criticism, and even a little fear. 

Sitting, breathing calmly, and savoring CLC’s peaceful surroundings through my senses, I found I could let my mind rest easily as if the wheel of ceaseless chatter had ground to stop, or at the very least, slowed its revolution. Taking in a deep breath of the clean, wilderness air, I softened my gaze on the water and continued listening. 

Afternoon sun glistens off the calm waters of Frood Lake.

Riding the waves of emotional influence🌊

Matching my inner calmness to the stillness of the river led me to a realization. My own mind often mirrors those waters of CLC. My mind tends to be at its calmest in the early morning or at night–just before drifting off to sleep, letting go of the day’s worries.  However, once the day fully begins, I am immersed in work and various tasks with multiple decisions being made throughout the day.  As my decision making increases, my judging brain kicks into high gear.  With that continued judgment comes an inner dialogue often influenced and affected by emotions, which rise and fall throughout the day much like the water around me did during the week.

Throughout our time fishing, resting, and relaxing in CLC, I observed how the river and surrounding lakes could quickly become stirred up, rising and falling with the winds of the day, tossed about with a changing weather front, or even fill with large waves when an occasional boat sped across the waters to the farthest end of a lake. There were additional times, when for no discernable reason, the waters would suddenly ascend and descend, jostling the boat John and I were in. 

Riding out the waves of emotions can be similar to navigating a fishing boat over wave-filled waters.

Restless emotions 😬

Fishing during those moments of restless waters and winds was challenging.  The wind would take hold of a perfectly thrown cast and carry the line and lure in a completely different direction than intended. Likewise, when the waters were lifting and dipping with waves, the view beneath the waters was clouded and murky–not allowing the eye to determine if the boat was above rocks, a weed bed, a submerged tree, or any other number of possibilities. Conversely, during the moments of calm, settled waters, navigating and fishing those waters was fairly easy and what was beneath the boat was clearly visible.  

Looking out at the peaceful waters of Whitefish River through the screened porch.

The influence of a RAcing Mind 🤯

The riverview before me, in that early morning hour, was emblematic not only of ideal fishing waters, but also a peaceful state of mind.  Unfortunately, our modern world tends to create and drive the opposite effect–a constant flurry of stirred-up waters–our minds fidgety and/or frantic, racing from one thought to another, moving through agendas of busyness, entertainment, and avoidance. Therefore, if we don’t set aside time to allow our minds an opportunity to cease its chatter and rest easy, how can we ever feel calm and think clearly?

Settle into into the stillness.

The importance of intentional Quiet 🤫

Our inner dialogue is often affected by the changing weather of our emotions.  Those emotions vacillate and shift with each decision we make and with each event we encounter.  And while I fully admit that mind chatter, and all of the emotions that come with it, cannot necessarily be avoided, in similar manner to the weather fronts we experienced during my time at CLC, our emotions can vastly change within the course of a day, much less a week. Therefore, deliberately providing pockets of time for stillness allows us to detach from the emotional narratives, and instead, fosters listening to that still, small voice of knowing, which allows us to, well, “fish” for the truth.

Listen for the whisper of our Creator, the great I AM.

LeT us Listen for the whisper 👂

Ralph Waldo Emerson once penned, “Let us be silent, that we may hear the whisper of God.” What a powerful reminder of the importance of settling the mind, like the still waters that were before me on that morning at Charlton Lake Camp. The type of quiet we choose can be a formal meditation/reflection, but it could also be achieved through walking or other forms of exercise, tending to your flowers/plants, or simply sitting on the porch sipping coffee or tea and listening to the birds. It really doesn’t matter as long as it is an intentional moment set aside to calm those mental waters of ceaselessly, flowing chatter. Prioritizing time for quiet reflection or meditation, however you define it, allows the flow of our hearts and minds to settle, soften, and encounter the “whisper of God.” 

Willisville, Ontario

The gift of single-mindedness–we tap into the present moment

Featured by stephsimply, posted in Simple Observations and Musings

“This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it’s with us wherever we are.”–Pema Chödrön

REsistance is Futile🤯

I heard the thud and subsequent scattering of parts.  Then, I heard John, my husband, enunciate a few choice words.  Since I wasn’t in the same room of the house, I wasn’t sure what had happened.  Soon enough, John walked into the kitchen-dining room area and set an open socket and driver kit on the table.  Pieces of varying sizes were scattered around the kit like a collage of autumn leaves covering a walkway.

As a few more select words were uttered, John went to work. Watching him work reminded me of those long ago hidden picture pages in Highlights magazine that would entertain me as a young child anytime I visited the pediatrician’s office.  John focused intently as he matched pieces to their corresponding recessed area for storage.  Observing his level of attentiveness to the task at hand, I was struck by the fact he was exemplifying the power of single-minded focus.

Single-minded attention is not myopic 🔎

Bringing single-minded attention to a task is different than being so myopic on one thing, you fail to see the bigger picture of life.  Rather, single-mindedness is the ability to prioritize tasks, and then focusing solely on the most important task before moving on to the next.  This level of concentration requires the self-discipline to remove distractions and remain present with the task at hand.  By removing distractions and avoiding the temptation to multitask, the brain can more easily slip into a flow-state of productivity and/or presence. 

Sure enough, I noticed that in the beginning, when John was resisting the moment, as we have all done, by giving into anger and frustration–as evidenced by the colorful language–he was unable to correctly match the parts to their corresponding depressions.  However, as he let go of the resistance, surrendered to the task at hand, he began to more easily match each part to its recess.  A few moments later, John was into a flow-type state, with each successive match, the quicker the next match came.  Soon enough, albeit probably not soon enough for John, the kit was fully assembled, all parts righted into their nesting spot.

Photo by William Fortunato on Pexels.com

There’s nothing wrong with Mutli-tasking, but . . . 🎧

Many of us multi-task, and our busy, fast-paced world tends to promote multitasking as a regular practice. Obviously, there are merits to multitasking to “kill two birds with one stone” as the old expression goes.  However, there are limits to our focus.  When we are engaged with several tasks at once, no one task gets our full attention.  This is fine in the case of listening to a podcast or book while doing something else where the stakes are low–after all you don’t need to focus on every detail of the book or podcast to glean the overall message/meaning. Thus, nothing is majorly lost if we are not fully focused, and if it is, that’s what the rewind button is for.

In life, however, we don’t always get a rewind button.  Therefore, there are times when it is important to only focus on one thing at a time.  Most of us understand this.  For example, you most likely wouldn’t take a phone call during an important meeting at work or complete work tasks while attending an important doctor’s visit. (Well, maybe in the waiting room, but definitely not when the doctor or staff is in the room with you!)  Likewise, you would be offended and feel short-changed if you encountered either of these scenarios during an important work meeting or an urgent doctor’s appointment.  Nonetheless, how many other moments do we short-change by multitasking?

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Single-mindedness can be applied to any moment in life 🍏

Any moment in life can be met with single-minded attention, and I do believe there is value in also practicing it.  Eating an apple, going for a walk, talking with a spouse, child, or loved one, even washing dishes after an evening meal can be completed with single-mindedness.  When we take time to solely and fully focus on one event, we are taking time to honor its importance in our lives.  For example, when eating a green apple, as we take a bite, we notice the crunch of the apple, the juice that seeps from the tender fruit with each successive bite, the sweet and tart taste on our tongue as our own mouth begins to dance with saliva.  As we fully taste the apple we can appreciate the nuance of flavors and texture experiencing pleasure, and perhaps, gratitude.

During the act of single-mindedly washing dishes, we are more readily able to take in the scent of the detergent bubbles filling our sink.  We notice the blue and red hues that skim the surface of each bubble.  Our hands warm and turn pink as we immerse them repeatedly in the silky water of soap.  Each dirty dish frees itself from the remains of the meal under the guidance of our hands, and it is rinsed shiny clean under a stream of water from our faucet.  As your mind enters into the flow of washing dishes, there might even be a moment when it occurs to you how fortunate you are to have running water and the opportunity to own enough dishes for everyone in your family.

Obviously, not every moment can be that idyllic, but I do think that practicing single-mindedness can offer numerous benefits.  When it comes to work productivity, focusing on one task well before moving onto the next, increases both productivity and accuracy.  For those in creative fields, single-mindedness can guide the brain into a desired flow-state where ideas begin to stream with ease.  Additionally, when applied to a conversation, single-mindedness not only conveys importance and value of the other person, but it also allows both parties to hear and be heard. 

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

sprinkle it throughout your life like spice to enhance specific moments 🧂

Our time and energy for each day is limited. Thus, there will always be a time and a place for multitasking.  However, it is also important to recognize the preciousness of life. Therefore, it is a worthwhile endeavor to consider and prioritize certain tasks and events for which we will single-mindedly focus our attention. 

When we take time to give something or someone our full attention, we are also giving it our full appreciation. Giving an event our full appreciation leaves us open to feelings of gratitude. Our ability to perceive and appreciate details increases, and the event becomes more sacred as corny as that sounds. 

Practicing single-mindedness is not an all or nothing attitude.  It is a practice we can apply to specific moments in our daily lives.  The more we practice it, the more it is possible to feel the richness of our lives.  We have been endowed with special attributes, talents, and blessings, and it is only for a length of our short life on earth. Why not occasionally and single-mindedly take time to fully immerse ourselves in those gifts?

While you’re scrolling, your life is rolling

by stephsimply, posted in Simple Observations and Musings

“Social media is an amazing tool, but it’s really the face-to-face interaction that makes a long-term impact.”–Felicia Day

Most of us have been guilty of this.  I know I have.  However, having taken a huge step back for numerous months from my own personal use of social media, I often find it a point of fascination when I observe people in public who are engaged with the ¾-time dance of media consumption.  Scroll, scroll, tap.  Scroll, scroll, tap.  Scroll, scroll, tap.

Photo by Oleksandr Pidvalnyi on Pexels.com

Case in point, recently my husband, John, and I went to a nice restaurant for dinner.  We chose to sit at the small bar area for dinner–no waiting for a table and typically better, more attentive service.  Unfortunately, we picked the wrong night to go, and the restaurant–even the bar area–was slammed only minutes after we arrived.

While we waited (and waited) for food, the area in which we were seated became more and more crowded.  John and I were often bumped, jostled, and occasionally shoved in customers’ attempts to gain the bartender’s attention.  With so much background noise around us, it grew more difficult to talk, and I found myself drifting into people-watching mode.  

John calls this behavior, “Steph, the story writer mode.” This is because I will often lean in to him to share a narrative I’ve developed based upon my observations of others–nothing bad, just some made-up plot-line for a book that I could envision.  I like to think of it as one of my more creative and endearing habits, but I am not sure that John feels that way!  

But I digress . . .

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

On this particular evening, I noticed two types of people.  Those standing, or sitting, waiting for a table without talking while ceaselessly scrolling and tapping on their phones, with the occasional lean-over-to-another-person to share an image on their phone.  Then there were those whose heads were collectively bent over a communal phone, laughing and commenting on screen images. 

One such group was close to me, and their conversation was so loud that I could not tune them out.  They were repeatedly making particularly cruel comments about what sounded to be their so-called friends’ social media feeds.  While I am not niave to the ways with which humans can be cruel and/or talk to one another, I still found this groups’ negativity and harsh judgment of friends to be exceptionally mean-spirited.  I felt as if someone in the room had purposely roused up a nest of wasps, and the insects’ anger was being unleashed upon those within hearing distance of this conversation.

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Ultimately, John and I decided to get our food to go, and leave the negative environment.  Nonetheless, the moment stayed with me the next few days as I tried to process and understand what I observed.  

To begin, my instinct was to immediately think, in a self-righteous manner, “See this is what social media does.  It promotes and reinforces nothing but negative, hyper-competitive, social-comparing, cyberbullying, anxiety-driven behaviors.”  However, I know that is an unfair assessment.

Social media can offer positives.  It can allow for people miles apart to remain connected and easily facilitate communication, especially across time zones.  Furthermore, there are a wealth of sites offering support and coping mechanisms for those fighting serious physical and mental health conditions.  Additionally, there are numerous affirming informative communities for a wide array of specialized interests including physical and mental wellness, books, music, religious/philosophical pursuits, self-help/betterment, to name a mere few.

Therefore, I realized quickly my issue had more to do with the negative way in which social media can be used. For example, some of those I observed waiting for a table in a crowded entryway, may have social anxiety.  Therefore, flipping mindlessly through cute kitten and puppy videos could help ease the discomfort of being surrounded by strangers.  Perhaps, others have a tendency to become angry or rude during extended waits, so mindlessly scrolling through sports clips or silly dance moves takes the edge of their impatience, allowing them to pass the time more peacefully.

There might have been others who had had a particularly bad day, so they may have needed some positive or humorous images to settle their minds.  Others might have been using their wait time as an opportunity to get caught up on required reading, personal reading, or even the news of the day.  All of these are seemingly perfectly valid reasons.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

But here’s my two-part concern: One, the vicious cycle of comparison (either as a point for confirming that your life is better than others, or fostering the belief that your life is lesser than others); and two, inaction–ignoring the present moment, failing to appreciate your surroundings, and/or overlooking an opportunity for real time engagement with the people who are present with you (or perhaps only a phone call away).  

In fact, the next day, as I watched what was clearly a mother and daughter in a coffee shop in which mom was doing the “scroll, scroll, tap” on her phone as the daughter looked around the coffee shop, picking at her food, a phrase came to mind, “While you’re scrolling, your life is rolling.”  

I am not sure if I made up that phrase, or if it was a phrase I had previously heard.  However, at that moment, as I waited for my own to-go order, it seemed fitting. The mom had an opportunity for real-time conversation with her daughter, but the moment was tragically passing.  One day, the daughter will no longer have time to get coffee and cake with her mom, and cherished moments, like the very one they were experiencing, will have passed.

Photo by Victor Freitas on Pexels.com

Of course, this mom could have had a very valid reason for being on her phone. After all, I was only in the shop for no more than five minutes, so I have no way of knowing.  The point is this, social media and the internet are a lot like the opening line to Star Trek, “Space–the final frontier.”  Our phones and other devices are tools, full of limitless possibilities and discoveries, but just like the Star-Trek crew, they are not replacements for real-life interactions.  

Our bodies, minds, and souls have a limited amount of energy and time.  In fact, our time and energy are precious commodities.  Therefore, what I have concluded is the importance of mindful awareness–not only of our use of social media, but also of the very pricelessness of the life that is around us.  Positive social media engagement, in strategically planned doses, can absolutely be beneficial, but it cannot replace those real-time conversations, interactions, and opportunities that surround us.  Bringing awareness to those real-time, life-connecting, and affirming relationships should be a priority in our day-to-day life over social media, before those opportunities pass us by.

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Combating SAD and those winter blues

by stephsimply, posted in Simple Observations and Musings

Dawn is one of my favorite times of the day.  All is quiet and peaceful.  The colors of indigo, purple, and blue gently fade into shades of boldness– cantaloupe and blood orange. Ultimately, such an audacious start cannot last, and those bold colors melt into a subtle blush.  It is as if all of nature is holding its breath.  There is a hush that can be felt, rather than heard. This quiet sweetness is often intercepted by the temerity of a bird singing, “Chip-a-we, chip-a-we.”  Soon other birds echo their harmonies–little melodies of hope.

As the sun rise wipes away the darkness from the skies, yesterday is officially rinsed away.  Lifelong teacher that she is, Mother Nature, hands each of us a new canvas.  We can begin again.  

Photo by Micah Boerma on Pexels.com

But what about those days, when skies are blanketed with the clouds of fall and winter?  When the morning doesn’t possess the grandeur of the symbolic gesture of a slate cleaned.  When, instead, all those burgeoning clouds seem overflowing with all of the errors and mishaps of the previous day, and the sorrows and pains of the future appear to hang low on the horizon of inky darkness.  When the mind, like a glass bottle tossed into the sea, drifts from one fret to another.

Another winter looms larger than ever.  The past feels forever chained to the soul, and the future, oh-the-future, what more frets could it hold?  Our thoughts begin to plague us. We are held in bondage to our thoughts.  Bondaged to the what-ifs, the how will I be able to, and the weight of the unseen dangers lurking within every charcoal layer of gloominess.

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It is not uncommon for many of us to fight this sort of mental tug-of-war as cozy, amber autumnal hues dissipate under winter’s drab, gray overcoat.  An affable cook with whom I worked during my long-passed college days, named Shirley, would say, “Ah, honey, that ain’t nothin’ but them winter blues.”  She’d tell me to be grateful for my life, praise God more, and, “Bundle up, git outside, girl! Go for a walk, and git ya sum fresh a’r. A little cold won’t harm ya, and it’ll chase them ol’ blues away!”   Turns out, Ms. Shirley was on to something.

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According to the Cleveland Clinic, seasonal affective disorder (SAD), is a form of depression, triggered by the change in seasons, typically beginning in fall, and worsening throughout the winter months until the days begin to lengthen at some point in spring.  It more commonly occurs in young people and women, but men are by no means immune to it.  The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that about 15 million adults, or 7.1%, of the US population experience SAD, with another 10% – 20% of the population experiencing some form of the winter blues.  

With so much of the population already experiencing depression, anxiety, and/or phobias, it felt important to share a few established practices, according to several leading medical institutions, for coping with SAD and the winter blues.  

Go outside. One of the most common techniques is getting outside for a walk, even for a few minutes, like Ms. Shirley suggested all those years ago.  Even on cold and cloudy days, getting outside provides multiple benefits.  It exposes you to light, and the movement increases blood flow and oxygenation, all of which are good for producing those feel good hormones.  

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Regular exercise.  Along those same lines, according to Helpguide.org International, regular exercise–whether you are doing it inside or outside–can be as effective as medication, without the worrisome side effects. Choose a form that is rhythmic and continuous and also incorporates both arms and legs, such as weightlifting, walking, swimming, tai chi, dancing, and so forth, as this provides the most benefit to mental wellbeing.  Regular exercise and/or continuous movement boosts serotonin, endorphins, and other mood enhancing brain chemicals.  Furthermore, exercise and/or movement improves sleep and boosts self esteem. 

Light exposure. Expose yourself to as much light as possible. Open up drapes and blinds during the day.  Sit and work, if possible, near sources of natural light.  Walk outside, and if you can tolerate the temperature, sit outside, even for a few moments.  Natural light is another way to boost serotonin.  Additionally, consider bright light therapy–special lamps or daylight simulation light bulbs–to use while reading, eating, working, and so forth. 

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Be social.  Reach out to family and friends.  Volunteer your time.  Meet friends for lunch, dinner, or coffee.  Join a support group.  It doesn’t matter so much what you choose to do, rather it’s about making social connections.  Even if you don’t feel like it, being social is a mood elevator.

Eat right.  Depression causes sufferers to crave starchy carbs, which leads to lethargy, lack of motivation, and even greater mood swings.  However, choosing fresh fruits and vegetables, along with complex carbohydrates, such as whole grain bread, brown rice, oatmeal, and even bananas, can boost that ever desired serotonin, without the sugar crash. Additionally, omega rich foods, such as oily fish, soybeans, walnuts, and flaxseeds, are known mood boosters, and, if taking antidepressants, may increase their effectiveness.

Keep a regular sleep schedule and engage in stress reduction practices.  Both are beneficial to ameliorating SAD symptoms.   Avoiding naps, or limiting their length, prevents the sluggishness that can often accompany them. Managing or reducing stress through various techniques, such as yoga, prayer, meditation, gratitude journals, and other mindfulness activities may be beneficial.  Other related tips include, completing one activity/thing you love to do daily, and even watching videos, shows, and/or movies that make you laugh are beneficial to reducing symptoms associated with SAD or those winter blues.

Wint-o-green mints.  Ok, so this isn’t an established practice.  However, it is my technique for using mints to remind me that if I “wint” int-o the present mo-mint, I can stop borrowing tomorrow’s troubles.  While I can’t say it’s great practice for my teeth, those round orbs of refresh-mint offer a sweet signal for my brain to slow down my monkey mind, breathe slower, and focus on one moment/thing at time.  Mint = Mind In Now-Time.

Acknowledging that winter can make many of us feel a little sadder is important.  Not only does it allow us to feel more compassion and empathy for those experiencing SAD, but it also gives us permission to recognize those feelings within ourselves, should we begin to experience them.  I can’t say I am a fan of colder temperatures, but I still get outside most days of the week, like it or not.  In the meantime, I can’t help but think Ms. Shirley would be pleased to know science now proves her sage advice to be true.